Tag Archives: op-ed

advice

What Advice Would You Give Your 17 Year Old Self?

By: Chris Warren.

The other night I was on the phone with a buddy I’ve kicked it around with since we were young brats. We are still close friends and we sometimes get carried away while shooting the breeze and yapping about whatever. What started as a five minute check-in call turned into a lengthy introspective. It was a sometimes serious, mostly funny conversation, contemplating what advice we would give our seventeen year old selves. As it turns out, it’s not really an original idea.

If I were having a face to face talk with my seventeen year old self, the list of advice would be far longer than can be fit into a few hundred words on a commentary blog. But there are two Big Things old Chris wants young Chris to know:

“First, you somehow got it in your head that you have to go it alone on everything, but there are a lot of people on your side, and letting them in, even just a little, would make your world a lot better. There is no shame in asking for help, nor is there any particular glory in struggling by yourself. Decades from now you will still be doing everything yourself, but by then you will have become a very resourceful person and learned to work it to your advantage.

“Second, take yourself less seriously: You brood over inconsequential junk that you’ll barely remember five years from now. I understand that friends, school, and life seem very heavy to you. It may shock you to hear me say this, but the world you are in now, the one that gives you so much stress, is not reality. It’s not even close. Everything gets harder from here. Your life will never be as easy as it is at seventeen. Toughen up and stop thinking that no one has bigger problems than yours. Not everyone who superficially treats you well is your friend, and not everyone who kicks you in the balls is your enemy. Learn the difference. If you can’t handle your present day problems, then there is no advice that will save you from becoming hopelessly dysfunctional as an adult.”

advice

Today I hear young people say stuff that sounds amazingly similar to things I said and felt myself when I was in their shoes. In their limited life experience, their problems seem very real. I feel a responsibility to help them gain some perspective and make them see that these things do pass.

One of the worst things an adult can do is trivialize a kid’s problem, even if the problem is, in fact, trivial. Yes, I get it: Breaking up with a girl/boyfriend after a two month “relationship”, or not making the team, or not having a date for the dance, or not getting cool new clothes don’t rank high as the most profound concerns in the world, unless of course your world is not that big to begin with. That is the viewpoint teens see things from. My advice to my seventeen year old self was to take myself less seriously. The advice goes the other way for the adults: Take kids’ concerns more seriously, because to them, making the team, or whatever, is a pretty big deal.

When I think back to those times I am somewhat embarrassed about how much I used to let trivial things bother me. I am certain that pretty much everyone my age feels the same way. If we all had the benefit of our adult selves counseling our teenaged selves, would we follow our own advice? I don’t think I would have listened. The paradox is that had I listened to my own advice, I would have missed out on the failures that resulted in the life experience that allowed me to give the advice in the first place. As the cliché goes, no pain no gain, at least until someone discovers time travel. My seventeen year old self will just have to accept the growing pains and wait a few more decades to see that my older self was right about everything.

gift

Ending The Gift Quid Pro Quo.

By: Chris Warren

One major holiday is done and we’re less than a month out from Christmas, a time when gift giving, for most of us, is a true expression of love and gratitude. For many others, they give stuff, they get stuff. In the end it’s a zero-sum game. To the extent that I can, I’m going to end the gift giving circle of absurdity.

Years ago my parents put their foot down and insisted that they wanted no gifts for birthdays, Christmas, or Mothers’/Fathers’ Day while at the same time retaining their “right” to give stuff to us kids. I know it’s a double standard, but they are the parents so we respectfully deferred to their wishes. At first I thought they were just being difficult. My parents worked hard and retired well. Having reached a place in their lives where they are comfortable, there isn’t very much anyone can give them that would make a big difference. Now I understand the psychology behind their demand: Not accepting gifts is my parents’ statement of content. Giving them more will not make them more happy.

Oddly, they do not seem to mind and are genuinely pleased if I give them a modestly-priced random gift for no particular reason. If I’m walking through a store and in a moment of serendipity spot something I know either of them would like, I’ll get it for them. My dad loves Guinness beer but never buys it for himself. So every now and them I’ll bring him a twelve pack, and he accepts it without any fuss as long as the gift is not tied to any special occasion. I don’t get it, but whatever.

If I spend $100 on someone, and they spend $100 on me, then what’s the point? Where are we going with this? How about if we both just spend the same $100 on ourselves call it good? All of the people in my life who I care enough about to buy gifts for already do little favors and help me throughout the year. I’m very blessed and I know it. There is no need to give me something on a special day once a year.

Although there are none in my circle that I’m aware of, the worst offenders are those who will try to predict what someone will spend on them, then go out and find a similarly-priced gift to give in return. They see gift giving as a social obligation and not a true expression of the season.

In my experience, the people who have the least usually give the most. To understand this concept, it’s important to point out that money does not mean the same thing to everyone. An unemployed guy who spends $10 on a gift is not looking at that cash the same way a very rich man who spends the same amount would.

A few years back, my nephew gave me a jacket for Christmas. It was a very nice jacket that I really liked and it probably cost him about $40-$50. Fifty bucks or so is not a lavish amount of money to most of us, but to a young college age kid putting himself through school on a ten dollar an hour job, it’s a significant cash outlay. I was beyond flattered and could see the glow in his face when he gave it to me. I deeply thanked him and gave him a big hug, then urged him to return it and use the money for school. He was adamant that I keep it, so I complied. Every time I put that jacket on, I smile and think of him. My nephew’s selfless spirit of giving was his real gift to me.

I refuse to participate in any gift quid pro quo. I’m going to borrow a page from my parents’ book of wisdom and push back against receiving gifts but still give them as the mood moves me. I don’t have everything I want in this world, but I’m a happy guy and am satisfied with giving gifts with no expectation that I’m owed something in return. This time around, for me, the greatest gift is not wanting any.

Thankful People, And The Other 364 Days.

By: Chris Warren

I must confess: I’m not into Thanksgiving, as in the holiday. It’s always great to have a huge meal and visit with nice people, but in my family we don’t need a special time for that. The day founded by early American colonists as a has evolved into “Christmas Lite,” and I’m not taking the thankful bait. It’s now officially a hollow, feel good celebration when for one day everyone raises their glass to the idea of gratitude but does not think much of it the rest of the year.

Thankful People have two common traits: First, they are never superficially grateful. They don’t post trite memes on Facebook and call it good enough or say “thank you” to strangers as a matter of courtesy more than true feeling. They will bring cookies to the neighbor who shoveled their snow without being asked, or send an email to praise the flight attendant who went very far out of their way to assist an elderly passenger in a wheelchair (both of these examples actually happened). If the bulk of your appreciation involves sitting around a table once a year talking about how thankful you are, then all you are really doing is making yourself feel good. Thankful People don’t just say they are thankful. Thankful People know it’s not about them. They act thankful. They make others feel valued, all the time.

Second, Thankful People cheerfully do things for others and are grateful for the chance to be of service. That sounds counterintuitive: Shouldn’t the one who hands out the blessing be the recipient of thanks? Yes, but appreciation is never a one way street. Every kind act originates from someone’s desire to make the world a little better. Knowing they have accomplished their goal is in itself a reason to be thankful. The Thankful Person puts the “giving” in Thanksgiving.

I certainly don’t have a problem with the concept of being thankful, or for that matter a day to commemorate it. Yet I can’t help but notice that Thanksgiving, the holiday, has lost its real meaning the same way hardly anyone thinks about why we have a Memorial Day or Labor Day or any other fill-in-the-blank-Day. It’s become another easy excuse to stuff our faces and watch sports on TV.

The fact that there is a need for a Thanksgiving is evidence that we don’t have enough of it. Why and how have we reached a point where gratitude requires its own special day? Thankful People are already living it, and everyone else won’t get the message anyway. What are they doing the other 364 days of the year? If you feel different on Thanksgiving than you do every other day, then you are doing something wrong.

radical islamic terrorists

Hear Ye, Hear Ye! All Good Citizens To Arms!

By: Chris Warren.

During the early history on the United States, the everyday person existed in a lifestyle of survival. There was no such thing as running to the store for a forgotten item. There was no organized public safety. There were no weekends off. Food, water, shelter, heat, clothing, everything, came out of one’s own hard effort. The settlers had to tap into their confidence, independence, and sense of inner strength, or die. Recent world events perpetrated by radical Islamic terrorists remind us why now is the time for all Americans to reclaim their independent Colonial spirit and personally stand up to the threats that seek to destroy the freedom the United States has sacrificed for over the two-plus centuries of our history.

Much has been said by world leaders about what can, should, or will be done about radical Islamic terrorists (note: unlike Barak Obama and the entire Democratic party, I will use this exact term throughout this article). The radical Islamic terrorists are not “contained.” They are on the move and expanding beyond the Middle East. Next stop: The United States. What are you, good citizen, going to do about it?

That was not a rhetorical question. I’m being totally serious: What are you, good citizen, personally going to do about radical Islamic terrorists? If the answer is some variation of “I can’t personally do anything,” or “Let the government deal with it,” then you are are unwittingly complicit in helping the radical Islamic terrorists achieve their goal and sadly disconnected from the spirit of the Colonial freedom fighters who birthed this great nation.

You are either armed or you are a soft target. It really is that black and white.

The most important and meaningful personal response to radical Islamic terrorists is having a way to defend yourself and by extension your country. You can’t (and shouldn’t) totally avoid “soft targets” such as shopping malls and sporting events. And there is no real defense against a suicide bomber or a maniac who takes over an airliner. But that is a weak reason to do nothing. There are measures anyone can take to have an advantage over most threats and not be a soft target yourself.

Being a hardened target involves carrying a gun at all times and knowing how to use it. The anti-gun American left is entitled to their old tropes and I’ll gladly shut up and permit them to prattle uninterrupted on the condition that they openly admit they are ok with being a walking soft target and they are ok with the thought of having absolutely zero options except luck if radical Islamic terrorists (or gang bangers, or any other form of social excrement) come to kill them and their families. I fully respect the anti-gun liberals’ decision to call 911 and sit quietly in their “gun free zone” piousness while they wait their turn to have their brains splattered on the wall. I will be busy shooting back. You are either armed or you are a soft target. It really is that black and white.

In Colonial times everyone was armed because there was a legitimate need to be. The frontier was a place were the perils were numerous and unpredictable; being caught without a means of defense was often fatal. Imminent mortal danger may seem far removed from modern life in the USA, and that’s exactly what the radical Islamic terrorists want you to think. The need to carry a gun is still as real as it was over two centuries ago. Political and military solutions are beyond the practical control of the average citizen, but there is quite a bit that we can do as individuals. The Second Amendment is the great equalizer.

All good Americans need to embrace the spirit of the Minuteman: Prepare yourselves and answer the urgent call to arms in defense of your own liberty. Do not wait until the radical Islamic terrorists are at your door and then hope others will save you. Protecting freedom is not the sole domain of the police, the military, or the government. It is your heritage. It is your personal duty.

Editor’s note: If you enjoyed this article, then you may also like my other Second Amendment related post, We Walk Quietly Among You

 

medical supplements

Medical Supplements Are Heirs To An Ageless Schtick.

By: Chris Warren.

The traveling patent medicine peddler who would go from town to town selling “miracle cure” potions and pills that presumably would work on just about any malady was a stock character in old western movies. Today, there is a modern version of the patent medicine scam known as the herbal and medical supplements industry.

In the movies, the sales pitch would be boosted by a paid shill in the crowd who would testify that he used the product and it cured everything that was wrong with him, from baldness to ingrown toenails. The end of the movie subplot was always the same: The concoctions were medically worthless if not outright dangerous, but by time anyone figured it out the quack doctor had long folded up his show and skipped town with everyone’s money.

These dramas have a basis in truth. In times past there really were salesmen tramping from town to town hawking fake medicine and draining wallets as they went. Today’s version of the patent medicine flimflam does not involve a smooth talking transient in a horse drawn wagon. Thanks to modern communications, they don’t have to leave the house or even be in the USA to rip people off with their medical supplements.

It’s impossible to avoid the hustlers of medical supplements because they are all over cable television and the internet. Pills that “melt fat”. Pills that bulk up muscle. Pills that make you more mentally alert. Pills that unclog your arteries. Pills to soothe your aching joints. And of course, for the gentlemen, pills that make your guy parts much more useful. Whatever your problem is, someone has a remedy for it. There are even pills for problems you don’t know you have. And we can’t overlook creams and ointments to melt fat (again!), remove wrinkles, and keep your joints from hurting (again!).

In addition to medical supplements is an equally robust industry selling devices that can help you with…do we really need to run down the list again? Perhaps the most ubiquitous device on TV in the USA is the Willow Curve. The cheesy gizmo looks like a prop from a science fiction movie and the manufacturer makes a lot of far-out claims about what this product will do; independent research shows thats it’s basically a $599 heating pad with some pretty blinking lights on it.

medical supplements

The whole point of this monologue is to observe that in a contemporary age when everyone is supposed to be sophisticated enough to know better, the quack medicine shows are alive and more popular than any 19th century roadside barker could possibly conceive. The bogus goods have been rebranded as “medical supplements” and come with the small print caveat “These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.” But the basic schtick is the same: Make amazing promises, collect the cash. And millions of people spend billions of dollars falling for it.

As much as I disrespect the scammers and their medical supplements, I do not think they should be run out of business. As long as the product is not obviously toxic, leave them alone and let them keep raking in the cash. If consumers give in to their vanity, or lack of due diligence, or sincerely held faith that any of that crap actually works in spite of an ocean of legitimate science that indicates otherwise, then they are complicit in the draining of their wallets and should accept whatever happens afterward.

Maybe the uncomplicated folk portrayed in the the old movies are not as fictional as we’d like to think. Like so many other things in this world, sensible judgement has difficulty standing firm against the allure of fast and easy solutions. Going by the number of medical supplements being pushed in the media, the descendants of the patent medicine swindlers of yesteryear are proudly carrying on their forefathers’ profession and have no trouble at all finding dupes willing to open their wallets.

buffet

The Food Buffet Serves Up What Is Wrong In America.

By: Chris Warren.

Regular readers know that Twenty First Summer is a libertarian, heavily pro-American platform. That doesn’t mean I don’t think the USA has any problems, but I typically keep my criticisms about the United States out of this blog. This time I just can’t let it slide. I’ve concluded that the food buffet of all places is a microcosm of what is wrong in the United States, and it embarrasses me not only as an American, but also as someone who believes in basic human decency.

As we entered the buffet, the wealth of food stretched before us gave us that “oh, wow!” breathless moment. This was not like the pre made frozen-then-reheated vats of soulless generic grub found on steam tables at inexpensive chain establishments and truck stops. This was an upscale experience of fresh seafood, cooked to order steaks, fresh soups, and beautifully made desserts from an in-house pastry chef. We were going high class that night.

The problem with this otherwise elegant buffet became immediately apparent. It wasn’t the food or the service. It was the other customers. We sat and politely ate our modest portions like civilized human beings while most, not all, but most, of the other buffet patrons proceeded to act like gluttonous slobs.

Buffet diners, many with a plate in each hand, lined up at the seafood station and piled on enough fish to nourish a pregnant sea lion for a week. Others were sitting at tables with three or four plates of mounded food in front of them. Another table had two large stacks of dirty dishes waiting to be carried away. The unfortunate buffet wait staff literally could not clear the table as fast as those two overstuffed pigs shoveled food in their mouths. By the way, I did not see anyone besides us leave a tip.

So what does a food buffet have to do with patriotism and being critical of Americans? Quite a bit. For beginners, the friend I was with is not originally from the United States. Even though he is a now a US citizen and fully acclimated into American culture, I was still embarrassed for him to see the spectacle. The frenzy of overindulgence and hedonism was unsettling. This is not the United States I want others to see.

The buffet customers, who are my fellow Americans, completely disgusted me. I’m confident that these are the same types who travel to other countries, act like they do here, and then wonder why Americans are resented. The pathos of the buffet slobs carries over to the attitudes of society in general:

  • People will take advantage of the system and grab up everything they can, even if it’s more than they need, or something they don’t need at all. They believe one of the goals of going to a buffet is to eat (or waste) more food than you paid for. They apply this ethic to every facet of their lives
  • There is no concern for those perceived as being of a lower social standing (in this case, wait staff). Servants’ needs and feelings are not relevant to those they serve.
  • Related to the last point, people will think that because they are paying for something (and even if they are not), they have the right to act superior and create gratuitous burdens on others. They believe their status as a client or customer absolves them of nearly any sociopathic behavior.
  • The attitude of entitlement is not more prevalent in any particular demographic. It occurs across all income, gender, and racial/ethnic groups.

How the citizens of a nation treat each other and humble themselves before the bounty they have been blessed with says something about that nation’s collective values, and the way I see it, the food buffet is a merely a symptom of the disrespect and lack of gratitude that exists everywhere.  For a guy who thinks the United States is the greatest place that has ever been or will be, it’s a difficult admission for me to make. But blind devotion is a false emotion; this one went far beyond mere table manners and must be called out for what it is. We The People can’t become better as a country if we think we are already superior as individuals.

Home Improvements Help Us Remodel Our Selves.

By: Chris Warren

Homeowners who hire a contractor for every little job cannot understand the pride and satisfaction of completing a do it yourself project that will make a house more enjoyable or increase resale value. Some of us take on a lot of home improvements that we probably could afford to contract out but choose to do ourselves anyway because there is a certain “it factor” that makes these tasks an attractive challenge.

Most jobs are very simple in regards to the mechanics of the work required. Like all things though, the real world experience is often much different. I recently installed some exterior lighting on my house. The basic procedure is easy: Run some wire. Screw light to side of house. Connect wires at both ends. Done. It all looks so easy in theory!

The headaches come in when you have to run the wires through walls or other not so easy to reach places, or when the hardware that came with the light is not compatible with your application, or when you are trying to make something both functional and not look like sloppy crap nailed to the side of the house.

home improvements

My dad has been doing his own home improvements longer than I’ve been alive, and he’s really good at it. He holds himself to a very high standard of craftsmanship, and after he completes a job, he will scrutinize every little detail and find something he would have done differently. It’s a learning process that I’ve adopted myself with very good results. Wise men never think they know it all.

In my circle of friends I’m known as the guy who always has a tool in his hand and hardly ever pays others to do things for me. Doing my own home improvements has the unexpected benefit of teaching me patience and discipline. All jobs look easy in concept. In reality, none go exactly as planned with no setbacks. The principle transfers to other areas of life. Having a plan is great, but there must be enough built in flexibility to address the inconvenient reality that life events seldom fit exactly into our preconceived plans.

Once someone is programmed for achievement, it is very difficult for them to set boundaries of when they will give their best effort and when they will not.

Home improvements are a perfect metaphor for how the real world works: I had the knowledge and tools needed to install an exterior light. I had a visualized plan of how I wanted to attain the goal. Once I began the task, I ran into unplanned setbacks. Some of these delays were due to my own oversight (drilling two holes when I only needed one). Others were out of my control (bad weather, incompatible hardware). Nothing gets done by getting angry at myself or cursing the weather. Keep moving, solve problems, find a way to get to the end.

One reason why athletes who are successful in their sport also tend to be successful in other areas is because they redirect the drive and motivation from the playing arena into their entire life. The same could be said for military people. Once someone is programmed for achievement, it is very difficult for them to set boundaries of when they will give their best effort and when they will not. A properly trained athlete or soldier is in “on mode” all the time, even years after they are no longer active in sports or the military.

Home improvements such as hanging a light do not rank high on the glorious achievement scale, but the commitment to complete them with skill and pride is very meaningful to those who spend countless weekends and vacation days toiling on their homes instead of paying a contractor.

Deeper than money saved is standing back and admiring one’s own finished project and the feeling of independence and empowerment from not having to rely on paid help. Every time I walk past that light I’ll know how it got there: Not from farming the work out to others and handing them a check when it’s done, but from my own determination, sweat and ingenuity. I’ll need all the can-do positive energy I can get when it comes time to replace my hot water heater, which I suspect will be soon.

 

culture

Lessons From A Dixie Trip, Part II

By: Chris Warren

In an article last February I talked about traveling to the southern United States and returning with a deeper understanding and appreciation for the area and its people. The United States is hardly a homogenous nation. Every region is different in culture and thinking, sometimes vastly different, but still united by the red, white, and blue. Now I find myself traversing a different area of the South and, unsurprisingly, I’ve learned even more about the culture of the only country I’ve ever known and presumed I had completely understood.

This time I took a road trip to Arkansas in the Ozark Mountain (which technically is a plateau, not a mountain) and lesser known Boston Mountain area. As the aircraft taxied up to the gate at tiny Fort Smith airport, I was already getting warm, welcoming feeling that you don’t get at, say huge O’hare Airport. A culture of cordiality is universal in the South.

Fort Smith, Arkansas was the last stop on the Trail of Tears for American Indians as they were “relocated” from the eastern USA to what is now present day Oklahoma. The injustices the American Indians endured, their loss of land and language and culture, cannot be overstated. The displays at Fort Smith National Historic Site respectfully acknowledge this. It is one of the few instances I’ve personally seen where the U.S. Government didn’t make excuses for itself. There was no political correctness or painting over that the Indians were treated like complete crap.

There is barely a place in northwest Arkansas where you cannot see a towering mountain or lush, wide valley. In the deep South of New Orleans, Louisiana; Mobile, Alabama; and Pensacola, Florida, the locals would tend to talk in more personal terms about their families, regional foods, and churches. In Arkansas, they make a lot of references to geographical features and history. When I would mention to a store clerk or waiter that I was a visitor, they would always suggest a historic landmark or natural area to go see.

On a whim, we went to scout out some rural investment property. Drifting out of cellphone territory into an area where you can drive for miles and see more livestock than people, we found the address we were looking for, I think. It’s hard to guess boundaries and there were NO TRESPASSING signs everywhere; we had no way to be sure if what we were looking at was what we were looking for. We never actually saw anyone, but we had a sense that we were being watched. People in these parts are heavily armed and live a culture of independence. Random outsiders are treated with suspicion, so we stayed on the main road and made it clear that we were respecting private property.

The big takeaway from this Dixie trip is that Arkansans are proud of their land and mindful of their Southern culture. The place is absolutely breathtaking, and history is everywhere. The crest of every hill reveals a view grander than the last. As we motored through the countryside I felt a bit envious that what was a travel adventure for me was an everyday experience for them. They got a real nice thing going on down there. I had a terrific time! When I go back, which will be soon, I’ll bring a greater understanding of a culture and people that are rightly proud of what they have.

materialism

A Shopping Mall Buddha And The Materialism Of Now.

By: Chris Warren.

I have fifty two items on my Amazon “wish list”. I don’t know how that compares with the average shopper, but I’m going to guess that I am a lightweight by Amazon standards. My wish list is just that..things that would be nice to have but are not particularly a priority. Some of the items have been on my list for years. The older I get, the easier it is to want stuff less. And the stuff I do want has a higher, long term purpose. Materialism for materialism’s sake is the source of a lot of the world’s problems.

During a recent weekend road trip I found myself hanging out in a very huge, very famous, and very upscale shopping mall. I’m not much of a mall person, but I do like to people watch and enjoy the experience of being around the energetic liveliness. As we strolled past the $1000 Coach purses and $600 North Face jackets, I noticed that pretty much everything that is sold in this mall is not necessary for daily life. I could not spot a single item that was truly needed and did not have a more reasonably priced alternative. I’m sure all those people in the North Face store were not there to provision themselves for an ascent of Mount Everest.

No one chooses to be poor, but materialism is a deliberate, conscious decision.

I don’t understand what motivates anyone to be sucked into the vortex of materialism. I try hard not to be judgmental, but it sure isn’t easy. Ultimately, I understand that how others spend their money is none of my business. At the same time though I don’t feel too sorry for all the people who are up to their eyeballs in debt from impressing themselves and everyone with their trendy, premium brand stuff. No one chooses to be poor, but materialism is a deliberate, conscious decision.

Reaching a stage in life where it’s pretty certain that I am not destined to be rich is in a way, liberating. It does not bother me that I can’t (or more accurately, shouldn’t) buy the North Face jacket. It does not bother me that some of my neighbors have spent more money on cars than I have spent on a house. It’s not that I’m poor, it’s that my priorities go beyond the materialism of now. My focus is on things that matter, like securing my retirement and making room in my future plans for friends and family members who are not as well situated as me.

materialism

The Buddhist religion teaches that desire is the source of evil. If we remove desire from our hearts, then evil would by default not exist. I admit the previous synopsis oversimplifies one of the world’s great religions, but it does call attention to a valid point of Buddhism: Desire (from which materialism is derived) is a driving force behind pretty much everything bad.

I think we’d be in a better place if people desired less stuff. Unfortunately, we live in a society that celebrates materialism, and social media is eager to feed the pig. For months, one of my “friends” filled the internet with weekly photo updates of their new house construction; it read like an over the top real estate listing. The news feed was briefly interrupted only to announce their new boat and ski trip to Aspen. This person is not an outlier. Facebook is brimming with photos of new cars, exotic vacations, and expensive dinners. It seems no one can resist running to their computers to show off their bling.

Maybe I was a Buddhist in a previous life. Maybe I’m just simpleminded. For sure I’m not the kind of customer a mall operator loves to have around. They might get me for a $6 slice of pizza or sell me on an occasional good deal, but most of the time it’s easy for me to keep my wallet in my pocket and walk on by. Buddha has been dead for about 2400 years and his message is still relevant. There is great personal peace in being happy with what I’ve already got and feeling no intense pull to have more. Removing oneself from the materialism of now settles and warms a soul like no six hundred dollar North Face jacket could ever approach.

cb-radio

CB Radio Still Transmits Good Vibes.

By: Chris Warren

I was twelve years old and the Citizen’s Band (CB) radio craze in the United States had already been going for a while. After successfully nagging my parents into letting me get a CB, which included mounting a large antenna on their house, I had a hot signal all over town. All my friends were doing CB, too. It was like the Twitter of its time. I did not know that the ghost of CB radio would still be sending out good vibes so many decades later.

The fad took off around 1975. It had its own quirky vocabulary. There were magazines and organized clubs devoted solely to CB radio. CB radio became a major theme in contemporary movies, TV shows, and gave birth to an entire genre of amazingly lame songs. No one used their real name on the air. Colorful “handles” (a made up name) were used instead. In our area we had The Lamplighter, Dream Weaver, Handy Andy, The Bookkeeper, Pizza Man, Old Grey Mare, Four String, Beholder, and dozens of others.

These people were not just voices in a box. They were friends and neighbors.

Most towns had an unofficial CB radio “home channel” where the locals would hang out and chatter away, often late into the night. In Naperville, it was channel 15. It was a cheerful place; even us kids were welcomed. CB has a practical range of about five miles (8.04 km); it was the perfect medium for an electronic town square where everyone can gather.

Every Saturday morning CBers would flock to Grandma Sally’s Pancake House for an “eyeball” (that’s CB lingo for a face to face meeting). On some weekends over twenty people would show up. If any of the regulars were not heard on the radio in a while, someone would go check up on them. These people were not just voices in a box. They were friends and neighbors.

As with all fads, CB radio fever quickly flamed out. Pop culture jumped to the next big thing and by 1980, the airwaves went dead as we kids got older and found other things to do while the adults likewise lost interest and fell away. No one even thinks about CB radio anymore: Smart phones and all the goodies that come with them have eliminated the advantages of analog CB radio, albeit with less personality and camaraderie. My run on CB lasted less than three years. But wow, what a great run it was!

Today, the CB channels are now mostly a wasteland of static and pirate operators running illegal amplifiers. About all that’s left of any significance is long haul truckers exchanging travel information and scattered hotspots of legitimate users such as farmers and outdoorsmen. No one uses CB radio just for socializing. High end CB radio sets that used to cost hundreds of dollars (in 1978 money!) can now be found at flea markets in working condition for about twenty five bucks or less.

At the time I didn’t know my Realistic Navaho TR-431 CB would turn into an obsession with amateur (ham) radio, which to this day I am still deeply involved with, and ultimately into a fulfilling career as an electronic technician keeping transmission equipment on line for a large telecomm company. Not many people do as adults what they dreamed of doing as kids, but I’m one of the lucky ones. The pedigree of my entire professional life can be traced back to that one CB radio.

The short lived glory days of the citizens’ band are indeed never coming back, yet CB radio has earned immortality in American culture and in many individuals’ lives. As anyone who has ever heard the Red Sovine song Teddy Bear can attest, CB had a lowbrow, tacky aura to it, kind of like a circus sideshow. Beneath the cheesy sentimentality, it also had a genuine homespun touch of class. The CB radio signals have faded forever but the happy vibe is still being received loud & clear.